Don't Cry Over Spoiled Milk

Whoever said, "don't cry over spilled milk" never actually tipped over a bottle of human milk. They should have clarified that with "don't cry over spilled COW'S milk."  And those same people never had to throw away old/bad/allergy-filled human milk either. When Mia was a baby I learned that I had an enzyme in my milk that caused it to taste different after being frozen. Allison never seemed to care, but Mia refused to drink my milk after it had been in the freezer. Once we discovered why she was refusing bottles, she only got the fresh stuff. I had about 85 ounces already in my deep freeze when all this craziness started. And for anyone who has ever pumped, throwing away milk is not easy.  In fact, I couldn't do it. So it has remained in my deep freeze...until now.


By the time the twins were born it was already passed the expiration date for frozen human milk. But I still couldn't bear to throw it out.  Today I needed some space and actually had the gumption to pull it out and dump it. And I shed a tear. Breastfeeding is a passion of mine (I'll post about it someday), but giving babies human milk is even more of a passion. I have friends who have adopted who have gone to great lengths to give their babies human milk. And I also know a few true heroines who exclusively pumped to give their babies the best start to life. To me that is the epitome of self sacrifice. WOW. I stand in awe of those moms. Rock stars to the very core.

I hope that those of you who can sympathize with my situation today will leave a comment for me. And for those of you who think I'm crazy, that's ok, I do have a bit of crazy in me. Crazy for my girls :-)

Comments

Mandy Leigh said…
i still can't bring myself to throw away about 36oz in my freezer right now! love your post!
Bethany said…
I've never had to throw any of mine out... but I am sure it would hurt! Praying I will make enough for the new little one!! And I'm sure I will get some people thinking I'm crazy too :)
Becca said…
I can totally sympathize :) You aren't crazy. It is gold. It is a huge gift. I am so glad I have been able to pump extra, for my babies and for other precious ones that need it.
The Moodies said…
Shed a tear with you. :'-( It's like a little piece of you...
Julie said…
I'm right there with you Shana!! I still remember the first day I went to work, I had a supply ready and off I went, when I came home my whole supply was gone!! My Mother-in-law kept trying to give my son new bottles and kept "waisting" my perfectly good milk!! I was so upset, that I am actually surprised to this day that she forgave me for my reaction!! I was always very protective over MY milk, and my whole family learned to follow my rules for breast milk(given to me by your mom!!) Those were the bast days of my life, and yes like you am passionate about giving human milk to babies. I learned a lot during my first son and have been able to help many friends and family through the same!!

Also, I LOVE your posts!!

~Julie
As someone who nursed one until 18 mos and one until 24 mos...AND one who had to pump twice from both sides to get a bottle's worth, I truly feel the pang in throwing that away. I consider breastfeeding my babies one of my life's greatest accomplishments. LOVE your blog!
Amber said…
I feel you. I made sure we used every dropped I pumped/froze whether in bottles, cereal, or fruit and yogurt. I dreaded nightly pumping and had to psych myself up and deep breathe every time :)
I totally agree! I think its the single greatest think you can do for your baby! Better than liquid gold, it's LIQUID LOVE! And it takes a lot of "sweat and tears" to make those babies grow!
Nicole said…
I just found your blog from your guest post and so identify with this post! I exclusively pumped for my daughter who was born with a cleft palate and couldn't nurse - I pumped for a year. Due to lack of freezer space and a huge supply (and nowhere to donate), I had to dump so much milk and it always felt so wrong to do it! It was so much work and then to "waste" it was hard!
heather said…
As one who had to exclusively pump, I have shed so many tears over " spilled milk". Jon and I would handle those bags and bottles like the finest china so i totally understand! Loved your post!

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